Just Moms

God has given us two ears, but one tongue, to show that we should be swift to hear, but slow to speak. God has set a double fence before the tongue, the teeth and the lips, to teach us to be wary that we offend not with our tongue. — Thomas Watson

What can anyone say after reading this quote?? For once, I was actually speechless when I read it! LOL

But what does the tongue look like today?

It looks like…

Email.
Text messages.
Facebook comments.
Myspace pages.
Twitter accounts.
Blog sites.
Voice-mail.
Cell phones.

I think when this quote was written, the author probably literally meant the tongue and our speech. But our speech is heard in so many ways now, which means we have to be even MORE careful in what we say, type, text, post, etc…

Have you ever offended someone and not known why? Has someone stopped speaking to you and you just know there is something wrong, but you can’t recall what you said or did? If so, maybe you should start looking over your past emails, text messages, facebook comments, etc…

So what if you DO find the source of the tension between you and someone else?

1. Pray about it and seek God. Going to that person without seeking God is a huge mistake. Pray and ask God to guide you and give you the perfect opportunity to talk to them.

2. Be sensitive. If you feel that your comment was innocent, don’t make light of the fact that it offended the other person. You may know the intent of the comment made but the other person may not. Try to understand why they took offense, and be sensitive to their feelings.

3. Be genuine. We all know what it’s like to have someone apologize to us when they really don’t mean it at all. Don’t let that be you! Apologizing doesn’t necessarily mean you are apologizing for what you said, but it could mean that you are sorry for what the comment DID to the other person. It’s all about the heart.

4. Give it time. Things may not change over night. It may take time for the other person to “warm up” to you again. Just continue to pray for them and be their friend, no matter how long it takes.

So what if you DON’T find the source of the problem?

1. Pray. Prayer is always the beginning of resolution. Ask God to show you if you did anything wrong. Pray that He will reveal to you why the other person may be offended.

2. Confront. If you can’t find what you may have done wrong on your own, then ASK! You may find that they are upset about something but it has nothing to do with you. That opens up a door for you to pray for them all the more.

3. Move on. If God doesn’t reveal anything to you AND the person won’t talk to you, then move on. I’m not saying to move on from the friendship, but just move on from the situation. Yes, they may be upset with you, but you can only do so much. When you have done all that you can do to restore the friendship, then know that God has seen all that you have done.

The ultimate goal of restoring a friendship is not necessarily between you and the other person. The ultimate goal is to draw you and the other person closer to Him. And by doing the above steps of “restoration”, you will be drawing closer to Him.

So today, I encourage you to:

1. Watch what you say, type, post, blog, etc… other people are listening and reading!
2. Restore a friendship that may be broken because of something you have said/posted.
3. Know when to move on.

I know how hard it is to feel like a friendship is broken. But give it time and continue to seek God. After all, friendship with Him is our most important friendship of all!!